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Yeti

Precious – like the ring to Sméagol. That one picture that had more expectations placed on it than a first-class Engineering certificate. The same picture that was tagged to a hundred people, and in thirty minutes, had got just one miserable ‘like’.

Yes, it was a terribly bad day, and Yetunde was having it.

She had altered her name to Yeti Hergun, because Yetunde Agun was obviously too ‘local’. The name ‘Yeti’ seemed hilarious to some of her Facebook friends, but Yetunde couldn’t figure why. She didn’t care either. Hilarious, as far as she was concerned, was good.

Now, she sat, phone in hand, staring at the photo she’d uploaded. Maybe it wasn’t good enough. Her pout – too pouty? The lipstick? The rouge was always perfect. Her hair was unquestionably flawlessly done, and it was the pretty side of her face she had showed – the side with the dimple. She couldn’t understand why the people online would rather make comments on political posts and stories than on her picture. Were they not aware that a picture also told a story? In fact, a thousand stories at that.

A brilliant idea popped in her head, and quickly, she entertained it. She stripped until she only had her bra and G-strings on. She was about to begin another picture-taking episode, when she saw a Facebook notification: ‘Fireburnthewicked Thunderfirethedevil commented on your photo.’

She couldn’t contain her excitement. She wasn’t bothered about the strangeness of the commenter’s name. She clicked to see the comment and to type a ‘Tnks’, but felt a surge of disappointment at what she saw.

The comment read: ‘Hi Yeti, I have lost 100 lbs in just one week. Check out how to lose even more. Click this link …’

Written by Joe Aito


About shakespeareanwalter

Walt Shakes(@Walt_Shakes) is an award-winning Nigerian writer, poet and veteran blogger. He is a lover of the written word. the faint whiff of nature, the flashing vista of movies, the warmth of companionship and the happy sound of laughter.

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10 comments

  1. :D. Ekwensu, biko gba break na ndu Yeti o!

  2. Damn! She didn’t know? Lol

  3. That ThunderfireThedevil chap sent me a friend request o. Didn’t accept. Thought he was from the village witches

  4. Hilarious. Walter, you sure know what I really need now

  5. Hehehehe…poor Yeti. After all the hair n make-up…n ensuring that it was the pretty side of her face…I wonder how many pics she took before she got one perfect enough for fb…all for one miserable like n ‘Fireburnthewicked
    Thunderfirethedevil’s comment. One thing is obvious tho: Yetunde needs a life…a real life outside Facebook.

    Nice one as usual.

  6. Oh My!!!
    Walter!! Yeti!! And I’m just seeing this here.
    So, if not for my regular rummaging through this site, I would have missed this!!

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