Have you ever been in love a second time? Have you ever been overwhelmed by a crushing feeling of affection towards someone? Have you ever just wanted to spend eternity looking into someone’s eyes? Have you ever seen eyes that hold galaxies – eyes that unraveled all of time and space? Have you ever looked at a face that holds destinies, where the past and present fight for a space in the future?
No? Well then let me introduce to Hadiza Cole.
She is beautiful. I must state that. She’s astoundingly beautiful. And her eyes…Damn, her eyes. They are amazing. They are what I fell in love with first. The second was her butt. That beautiful Calabar bum-bum. Yes, she’s from Cross Rivers. Don’t ask me why I named her Hadiza Cole. It’s the closest to her sexy name that I could come up with.
Hadiza is the one we were warned about in the manual titled Welcome to Rainbow Life. Did you guys get that manual after coming out to yourself? No? Yes? Oh well, page three states very clearly:
“Thou shall not trip, fall, stumble into the gutter of a straight woman/man in the name of love.”
Yes, Hadiza is that amazing straight person that you should NOT fall for. I really should take my own advice.
She’s twenty-six – old, right? I know, but in my defense, she was 25 when I met her. I think I have a thing for older women. She has smooth, lovely, fair skin. I love to hold her hand in mine just to laugh at how black I am. She doesn’t let me touch her a lot. Not that way, you dirty pigs. I mean, like, hold her hand, brush her cheeks, and touch her shoulders. We always have a certain distance between us whenever we sit. I wonder what she is scared of. I know what I am scared of. I am scared to let myself fall too deeply in love with her and I am scared because I know I have fallen so deeply and foolishly and completely in love with her.
She is quiet. She likes to listen. I love her voice. I could spend many long days just listening to her. She can sing but she says she can’t. Typical woman behavior. She can dance like mad though, you know those people that just hold your gaze with the way they shimmy. When she moves, I am lost in a portal. When she sways, my heart loses its way.
She’s my muse, you know, my source of inspiration. Speaking of muse, lemme tell you how I met her.
It was a warm Sunday afternoon. She was wearing a red dress. I’ll never forget that. I’d spotted her in the church, looking elegant and stunning. My head immediately started writing stories and poems in her honor from the first moment I set my eyes on her. This might seem inconsequential but here’s the thing: I had been having a mad-ass writer’s block for some months, and immediately I saw her, my imagination finally started to work again. I mean, talk about a sign from God. I felt in my heart that this right here, this bundle of hotness in front of me would be my new muse. (I will tell you what happened to my last muse later). So I decided to speak to her after a few Sundays of seeing her.
I was new in my sexuality, you know how it is. I was cocky and confident and certain every woman in this world wanted me. I felt like I exuded sexiness, and so in that spirit, I decided to go talk to her. I trailed her to outside the church building. Each time I moved to approach her, a ‘brother’ approached her. Like play like play, I spent thirty minutes waiting to talk to this babe o. I wanted to vex, and then it occurred to me that I should borrow myself some brain; I mean, look at how beautiful she is. Did I think I was the only one in the world that had eyes to see beautiful? Which virile heterosexual Lagos man will see her and want to carry last?
Eventually, she was finally alone. In my head, I shouted a loud ‘Praise the Lord’. I sharply gave myself a once over and then walked over to her to lean against her car. Red against black, simply beautiful. I lost my confidence immediately I looked into her eyes.
“Hello! Hi! Okay, so here’s the thing, I know you but you don’t know me. Hold up, let me change that. I don’t know you and you don’t know me, but here’s the thing: I see you every Sunday! You know, now that I say it out loud, it sounds stupid. But I do see you every Sunday and it is so creepy but good, I think.”
I rambled seemingly uncontrollably while her lips curved slowly into a smile.
“You do look a bit familiar but I can’t quite seem to place your name,” she said.
Hearing her speak is an experience on its own.
“Ife. My name is Ife and yours is apparently Colly,” I said with a little smile.
She leaned against her car without leaning on her car and laughed. Mehn, I had to force my knees to hold me up while my brain processed her sweet, sweet laughter.
“Colly is a nickname. My name is Hadiza. It’s nice to meet you, Ife.”
To be honest, in that moment, I couldn’t be sure if she’d said her name was Hadiza or Halimah. But them no born me well to ask her to say her name again. Plus she was already using sharp guy to tell me that she needed to go.
“The pleasure is all mine,” I said. “I do suppose you have to get going. I apologize for holding you up. Do have a good day.” I shot her my best ‘off-pant’ grin and then went back into the church to form good girl for my parents.
Well there you have it for today. The beautiful Hadiza Cole. The woman I am in love with. She is a constant 15% of my life. Do any of you have any version of a Hadiza Cole in your life? Tell me about her or him. Are they as hot as my Hadiza? Lol, see stupid question. Obviously not!
Written by iAmNotAPerv