A few days ago, we woke up to the most outrageous and ridiculous news that can possibly ever come out of a Republic in the 21st century: THE APPROPRIATION BILL IS MISSING!

How one can possibly conjecture such a happening beats me hollow. This budget is supposed to have been captured in both hard and soft copies. This budget is supposed to have been in the possession of every one of the 109 senators of the Federal Republic of Nigeria.

But alas! These 109 distinguished senators got up one morning and told us that the budget is missing.

The Senate President held an emergency meeting with President Buhari to discuss the missing budget. Can you imagine? Two of the most powerful leaders in the most populous black nation on earth spent hours of Nigerian time and tax payers’ money to discuss a missing budget. The over 170 million Nigerians, across the globe, should feel insulted.

Even as a primary school pupil, I hardly lost my exercise books or test scripts. The few times I did, I got a generous trashing from my no-nonsense mother. But here we are; well-paid and well fed adults, who are supposed to be distinguished in every way, have lost our budget and they are shamefacedly accusing each other and spewing lies from their anuses.

Anyway, them know say nothing go happen. In this country, nothing dey always happen when our leaders mess up. In other climes, every senator would have resigned by now. These guys simply don’t respect our intelligence to feed us such crap. But what we all must realize is that this legislative stupidity has a gospel it is preaching to the world.

The gospel about Nigeria is being preached loud and clear by this missing budget saga. We are telling the world that in the 21st century and with all the advancement in science and technology, Nigeria lacks the technological know-how to protect some sheets of papers. Then do we expect investors to believe that we have the technological know-how to protect their investments?

I have been to the National Assembly complex several times. That place is protected by all sorts and shades of our law enforcement agents. YET a piece of document got missing from right under their noses. And you expect the world to take us seriously when we tell them we can protect lives and properties?

If it is taking days to #BringBackOurBudget, then who does the government want to convince that there is still hope to #BringBackOurGirls? The political salsa being danced by the presidency and the legislators is robbing us of the little shreds of dignity we still have as a nation.

The biggest duty of our politicians should be to improve the brand of this nation by their words and actions and not to detract from it.

This is the gospel of the Nigerian legislators.

Written by First Baba Isa (FBI)

meandisa@gmail.com, 52F84BE5, @firstbabaisa

About shakespeareanwalter

Walt Shakes(@Walt_Shakes) is an award-winning Nigerian writer, poet and veteran blogger. He is a lover of the written word. the faint whiff of nature, the flashing vista of movies, the warmth of companionship and the happy sound of laughter.

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  1. I think what was missing was the official copy submitted on the floor of the NA by the president. Beside this copy each senator has it’s own copy.

    • I think such excuse should never even be aired. You can’t find it, you print another straight away and present. To have made this singular act of shame make national news is just one of the heights of Nigeria plenty nonsense

  2. Smh… The thing tire person abeg.

    • shakespeareanwalter

      The man who touted change so much, blazed so bright as Nigeria’s hope during the elections, takes on the mantle and his administration becomes a study in confusion.

  3. It’s so sad really, the way this country is so good at being an international embarrassment. Tomorrow, someone will now say the gays are the problem we have in Nigeria.

  4. Shameful really.

  5. Smh. Such arrant nonsense. The thunder that will fire them ehn … ?

  6. These men and women keep reminding us that this country is one huge joke. But I’m not surprised one bit. If billions of naira could be declared missing, what’s a pile of white papers to lose sleep over?

  7. 2011 – I had no shoes
    2015 – Change
    2019 -?????
    Whatever the slogan, Nigerians will sadly fall for the PR stunt again.

  8. The worst we can do as Nigerians is to talk and speak big big grammar and run analysis from the privacy of our homes. This too like many other rubbish that has been happening in this country will come and pass and nothing will happen. If they have the nerve to assume that Nigerians are naive enough to believe their cock and bull stories, what makes you think they think we can do anything aside talk about it on social media?
    I tire…

  9. Nigerians deserve the leadership they get. We are a complacent lot who are content with whatever crap we get. Someone once compared the patience of Nigerians with a rubber band; pull it till it’s about to snap the release it. It will go back to its original shape, that’s how we are. When we get serious as a nation and stop taking crap from those people, they will have no choice but to sit up. The ball is in our court………. Nice one FBI

  10. Change is the name of the game… I don’t think we have seen the last episode of this funny administration. God help my country Nigeria.

  11. Totally embarrassing.

  12. I wonder.

    Even a JSS1 student with a laptop cannot claim he can’t find his online notes. You’ve said it all. 109 people could not find their copies, but hard and soft and the committee that prepared it sef no fit find their draft copy both hard and soft to reprint. It just shows how little they think of us. I liken it to the Animal farm by George Orwell. But the one that pain me the most is that these people can forge documents and do every and anything to steal every kolo from our common purse and all of them together couldn’t even find an ingenuous way to fool us. They just came out without any atom of shame and open their mouths and say IT IS MISSING. My ancestors will come and look for it for them. I hope their children are ashamed of them. We all are just been enslaved not only by actions but by their minds too. It’s the saddest story of all times, unrivalled in its infamous glory

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