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THE APOCALYPSE

FOREWORD: Recently, a Facebook flash fiction contest was conducted on the social media between four writerly giants. After following the competition to the end, I happened on two of the stories that I loved and would like to share with y’all. Enjoy.

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TESTIMONY TIME

“PRAISE THE LORD!” the chubby woman screamed, waving her pudgy hands.

She had been delivered of blindness – one that plagued her for twenty years. She screamed once more in adulation and the mic whined in a protesting feedback.

“Have you seen wonders?” the moderator asked.

“No!” the crowd chorused.

“You will today! Keep checking! Blind eyes are opened, the deaf can hear, the lame can walk! Check! Check!” he cajoled. “Next!”

I walked up to the podium; behind me was a man with a mild paunch, a chubby face and a beaming smile. He was the General Overseer. Two men with similar dispositions sat beside him.

The moderator handed the mic over with his face grimly etched with terror. I guess my miracle was quite obvious. I could hear gasps sweep through the crowd as my image popped up on the giant screen that stood beside the podium.

“My name is Hector Magnus,” I said. “I have been bound through the ages. A curse held me down but as the man of God proclaimed these words, ‘You are loosed of all curses’, I came forth out of the ground. FREE!”

The crowd stared nonplussed.

“For how long have you been bound?” the moderator asked shakily.

“For a hundred years.”

The crowd gasped and I could hear hearts beating like a thousand drums.

“Bu…buh…but…you’re…so –”

“Young?”

“Jesu…Jesus—”

“And there’s another testimony,” I said. “I can feed now.”

I dusted mud off my robe and zapped towards the General Overseer. He recoiled, his eyes bulging in their sockets. I picked him like a rag doll and tossed him aside and the crowd cried. I sank my fangs into his jugular, draining him.

“Jesuuus…Je—!”

I snapped the moderator’s neck and took the microphone.

“Children of God, PRAISE THE LORD!” I roared.

And the crowd screamed.

Written by Philips Chuks

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Our Daily Bread

“Open that door and we’ll die!”

His hand on the door-knob, Stephen stared at the woman and kid hiding inside the church with him.

Outside, a trashcan lid flew against the door again. “Please! My girlfriend is in labour… Help us!”

The tall kid grabbed Stephen’s shoulder. “If you let them in, we fucking die.”

Stephen stared back. He had always hated kids. This one was foul-mouthed. Hiding in here with him from dawn till dusk had been frustrating.

“It’s my church. I decide.” He pulled the door open just a crack and the couple squeezed in.

The man’s face was wet with sweat. “Help! The baby is coming.”

Stephen recoiled. If there was anything he hated more than kids, it was making them.

“Lay her down, I’ll help.” The woman who had come into the church with the kid offered.

Stephen turned toward the dark window and peered out. Outside, something inhuman gibbered.

“They came out of nowhere,” Sweaty-face said. “They just try to eat you. Black eyes…my God…”

“Agege Zombies,” the kid said, shrugging when everyone looked at him. “That’s what I call the fuckers. Bromate chemicals in the bread caused this shit, right?”

“I heard it was some new additive in baking fat.”

“Jesus. Do you know how many people eat Agege bread everyday…” The sweating man pulled at Stephen. “You’re a priest, please…marry us. I think she’s dying…she didn’t want an illegitimate baby…”

Stephen shrugged and knelt between the groaning woman and sweaty man, intoning the words that blessed the hasty union.

The new bride gave a final push and died as the baby squealed. Stephen retched at the blood.

“She was bitten!” the foul-mouthed kid had seen a bite mark on the dead mother. “She’s going to fucking turn and you brought her in, you bastard!”

Sweaty-face turned to explain, and his bride suddenly lurched up and buried her teeth in his thigh.

In the middle of the resulting chaos, Stephen scrambled beneath a church bench and came face to face with the blood-smeared baby. Its eyes were black.

Great, he thought. Zombie kid. Just perfect.

Crunch!

Written by Emem Alexandra Akpan-Nya


About shakespeareanwalter

Walt Shakes(@Walt_Shakes) is an award-winning Nigerian writer, poet and veteran blogger. He is a lover of the written word. the faint whiff of nature, the flashing vista of movies, the warmth of companionship and the happy sound of laughter.

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6 comments

  1. LMAO!!! Ok, Testimony Time is hilarious! A classic vampire comedy. Chai.

    And Our Daily Bread… Dang! I shivered at that ending.

  2. Wait, na Emem write this Agege Zombie story?! That girl na winch! Wallahi! 🙁 🙁

    *now reading my ‘War Against Haman’*

  3. Thanks Sir Walt. This is so much. Feeling like I published something huge. It’s huge (nor mind me) and I’m grateful.

  4. Both were absolutely wonderful. These further prove we have many amazing, talented writers!

  5. I have always had an unhealthy fascination with agege bread, so I fiigured it was time to write about it lol!

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