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Mo’Nique Gives Her Husband a “Pass” to Cheat, Speaks on Open Relationships

When it comes to her nine-year marriage to Sidney Hicks, Mo’Nique doesn’t believe in adhering to the traditional rules between spouses.

“I originate from this place called Africa and what I know of African kings — tell me about one of them that just had one wife,” she told True Exclusives on Monday, Nov. 16. “Do you know any of them? I don’t… So when we came [to America], we adopted other people’s ways and that’s called ownership. I don’t want to be owned anymore… We’re humans, guys, that’s all.”

When the interviewer asked the Oscar-winning actress, 47, about people who give free passes to cheat in a marriage, she replied, “When you say ‘a pass to cheat,’ when you’re with your best friend and you say to your best friend, ‘I’m having these feelings about this person sexually and I want to share it with you.’ When you’re best friends, you can have those open and honest conversations.”

Mo’Nique didn’t seem to feel that monogamy is a realistic expectation, adding, “Often times people cheat because of something they’re not getting…All these people on the face of the earth, do you think my eyes won’t say ‘He’s fine!’ or ‘She’s attractive’? And if you want to go further with it, let’s be honest enough to have those conversations. What is it about that person that you find you want to sleep with them? Because they may give you something that I’m simply not willing to do. And if that’s the case, how could I be mad? Because I’m not going to do it, should I deprive you of not having it?”

The stand-up comedian did not reveal whether Hicks had slept with other people during their marriage, but she noted that the key to any strong bond is: “Honesty, that’s it. If you can’t tell the person you’re laying with every night how you truly feel, then you’re in a bad place.”

As a mother of all sons, she rejected the idea that she was raising them to become men.

“One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is to know my place,” she said. “And sometimes women get offended, saying, ‘What do you mean your place?’ Well, we all have one. Everybody wants to be the chief. Well, I’m not the chief in my household, their daddy is.”

This isn’t the first time Mo’Nique has been upfront about her open marriage. During a 2007 New York Times profile, she explained, “We have an agreement that we’ll always be honest. And if sex happens with another person, that’s not a deal breaker for us, that’s not something where we’ll say, ‘Oh my God, we’ve got to go to divorce court, and you cheated on me.’ Because we don’t cheat.”


About shakespeareanwalter

Walt Shakes(@Walt_Shakes) is an award-winning Nigerian writer, poet and veteran blogger. He is a lover of the written word. the faint whiff of nature, the flashing vista of movies, the warmth of companionship and the happy sound of laughter.

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10 comments

  1. Eeya, the weight loss is affecting her.

  2. Abeg abeg abeg, she knows she’s fat and ugly and the man is gonna cheat on her anyway, so why not allow him do it and tell her .. Mtchew.

    Her reasoning is dumb and feels like that of an average Nigerian woman(know your place).

  3. Having known some couples in an open marriage, I can categorically state that this is a load of horse manure. This woman is either cheating on her spouse who can’t do anything about it, or she’s looking for a reason to cope with a bad situation.
    I’m betting my bottom dollar on the latter.

    Open marriages rarely work, unless both parties really don’t care for each other and their marriage was a business arrangement.
    Where there are feelings involved, one party is just dying in silence. Period !

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